We haven't really been in the adoption process THAT long, but we HAVE been waiting for child #2 for quite a while now. I guess since we've had our first "nibble" (as a fellow adoptive mother friend calls it), I've gotten a bit more antsy. I think to myself "If that opportunity came to us so quickly when we hadn't even put the word out there that we were actively seeking to adopt, it shouldn't be too much longer before the next opportunity comes around now that most of our friends/family KNOW we're seeking to adopt." Allowing myself to think that way, even if it's only occasionally, makes the waiting that much more difficult. Jonathan & I desperately want to expand our family; Talen DESPERATELY wants a live-in playmate to play with her & a sibling to blame things on (lol!); our parents & siblings are also anxious to see our miracle arrive.
Probably the decision I wrestle with most right now is whether to continue our efforts at seeking a private adoption or go ahead & fork out the $5,000+ to sign up with an adoption agency to hopefully speed things along. Dollar signs have already been swimming around my brain as we get further along in the process, so an additional $5,000 out-of-pocket does not sound awesome at all. For example: we were made aware of a Facebook post that a friend of ours shared about an upcoming baby to be born that still has yet to be matched with an adoptive family. After digging a little deeper into the situation, the post originated from an adoption agency out in Indiana. Come to find out there are a few babies being born this summer that have yet to be matched with families. But in order to be in the 'pool' of families to be considered, you would need to apply to work with the agency. There's where that pesky $5,000 comes in to play. But if so many birth families communicate with adoption agencies, doesn't it make sense to go ahead & sign up with an agency so that you've put yourself out there as a possible choice? I keep going back & forth, weighing the pro's & con's of both sides. Then I just get frustrated again that I can't just conceive my own child, of which our insurance would cover almost all of the cost. Experience the fun of pregnancy (yes, I enjoyed every minute of being pregnant) & have it paid for ----- miss out on the birth experience & pay out the 'wazoo' just to bring our child home. Doesn't seem fair when I think about it. I guess my dad's famous line rings true after all....."LIFE IS NOT FAIR." So true, dad, so true.
